The Musers — 2025-06-07
The Musers — 1310 The Ticket, Dallas | Saturday, June 7, 2025
📋 Segments This Day
- Gordo Goes Wireless
- E-Brake
- Observation Deck
🎙️ Early Show Analysis
Segments
- Gordo Goes Wireless [00:00:00-00:08:04]: Gordo broadcasts live from the Big Tex Golf Classic at Tennyson golf course, conducting impromptu interviews with volunteers, catering staff, and State Fair officials while roaming around with a wireless microphone.
Funny Moments, Gordo Bits, or Memorable Quotes
- [00:02:25] The studio starts feeding Gordo absurd questions to ask interviewees, including asking a boxer about “Elizabeth Taylor” as if she were a fighter
- [00:03:12] Gordo inexplicably asks multiple people if they box, with no apparent connection to the context
- [00:05:00] Gordo randomly suggests a woman’s high school boyfriend “sold drugs or something”
- [00:05:37] Gordo tells the story about being Grand Marshal of Richardson High School’s homecoming parade, but they misspelled “Grand Marshal” on his sign
- [00:06:28-00:07:08] Extended discussion about a State Fair executive’s “chicken feet” tattoo commemorating her high school friendship group’s love of the Dixie Chicks
- [00:07:20-00:07:47] Gordo launches into a completely nonsensical monologue using “needing to be in love with you” in bizarre contexts, claiming he has a sore toe from kicking a 60-yard field goal
Summary
The segment features Gordo broadcasting live from the 15th annual Big Tex Golf Classic, a fundraising golf tournament at Tennyson golf course that benefits youth livestock auction and scholarship programs. Armed with his wireless microphone, Gordo roams around the event pavilion conducting his trademark awkward and absurdist interviews with various attendees.
Gordo’s conversations range from innocuous small talk about breakfast tacos and boxing with catering staff to increasingly personal questions with volunteers and State Fair officials. The studio hosts occasionally feed him ridiculous questions through his earpiece, leading to surreal moments like asking a boxer about Elizabeth Taylor as if she were a fighter, or repeatedly asking unrelated people if they box.
The segment peaks with Gordo’s extended interview with Karissa, a senior vice president of the State Fair and fellow Richardson High School alumnus, which covers everything from her high school cheerleading days to her memorial tattoo for her deceased mother, and ultimately her “chicken feet” ankle tattoo commemorating her friendship group’s love of the Dixie Chicks. The segment concludes with one of Gordo’s signature nonsensical rambles about “needing to be in love” in various absurd contexts, showcasing his unique brand of stream-of-consciousness comedy.
⏰ Mid-Show Analysis
Segments in this portion:
- E-Brake (Emergency Brake of the Week) [00:00:01-00:10:26]: Weekly segment featuring on-air mistakes/blunders from Ticket hosts, with listener voting to determine the winner
Sports topics discussed:
- [00:01:28-00:02:26]: Golf tournament coverage including the Women’s U.S. Open leaderboard discussion
- [00:03:09-00:03:15]: Mention of Craig Rosengarten and Rick Arnett co-hosting from a charity golf tournament at Las Colinas Country Club
Phone callers:
- [00:07:21-00:07:50]: Multiple callers voting in E-Brake, including one asking for choices to be repeated and another looking for “Jeb”
- [00:07:54-00:08:05]: “FakeTiger” votes for Gordon despite saying Gordon doesn’t like him
- [00:08:11-00:08:28]: “Cruz Enlito” recommends Earnhardt documentary on Prime before voting
- [00:08:43-00:09:21]: “Brady Tom” votes for Gordo, praising the comeback situation
- [00:09:22-00:09:28]: Caller votes for David Mino “F’ing Around”
- [00:09:32-00:09:55]: Confusing call about “number three” and diarrhea reference
- [00:10:03-00:10:26]: “Kate,” a 10-year-old first-time caller, votes for “number two, Stingo mingo”
Funny moments, Gordo bits, or memorable one-liners:
- [00:04:57-00:05:22]: Gordo’s emphysema-level coughing fit during live radio, followed by declining mouth-to-mouth from co-host
- [00:03:43-00:04:46]: David Mino accidentally saying what sounded like the F-word when trying to say “fail”
- [00:01:22-00:02:26]: Craig Rosengarten’s pronunciation struggles with golfer “Mayo Saigo” and saying “Wikipedia”
- [00:06:27-00:06:29]: Running gag about co-host always offering mouth-to-mouth resuscitation
Pop culture, music, or non-sports topics discussed:
- [00:08:18-00:08:24]: Discussion of Dale Earnhardt documentary on Amazon Prime
- [00:03:36-00:04:20]: Talk about kids’ birthday party at roller skating rink and PVC pipe skating aids
Summary
The E-Brake segment featured three nominees for the week’s biggest on-air blunder. Craig Rosengarten earned a nomination for his typical pronunciation struggles while covering golf, mangling golfer Mayo Saigo’s name and referring to “Wikipedia.” David Mino was nominated for nearly dropping the F-bomb on air when discussing kids needing to learn from failure at a skating rink, with the word coming out as something that clearly included a “U” sound before he caught himself.
The star nominee was Gordon Keith, who suffered a massive coughing fit while battling what he later revealed was COVID. The coughing was so severe it brought the show to a halt, with Gordo’s emphysema-like hacking becoming the stuff of radio legend. His co-host’s repeated offers of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation added to the comedic chaos of the moment.
Listener voting showed Gordo taking an early lead with three votes, while Mino had one and Craig Rosengarten had yet to receive any votes. Notable callers included regular characters like FakeTiger and Brady Tom, as well as a 10-year-old first-time caller named Kate who voted for “Stingo mingo” (her nickname for Mino). The segment showcased the typical Ticket blend of self-deprecating humor and listener interaction that makes their E-Brake segment a weekly highlight.
🏁 Final Hour Analysis
Segments in this portion:
- Observation Deck (00:00) – Gordo’s signature segment sponsored by Tylock George Eye Care, discussing goldfish racing in San Diego and the controversy surrounding it, with animal rights protesters claiming the fish are “terrified”
Phone callers:
- [00:10:30] Ten-year-old caller voting in Emergency Break of the Week, out of school for summer
- [00:10:45] Caller voting for Craig’s “Dumb and Dumber” reference about Detroit Lions quarterback
- [00:11:00] Caller referencing someone in a wheelchair doing a “Russian dance” to vote for Gordon
- [00:12:09] Joshua voting for Gordo, securing his victory
Funny moments or memorable Gordo bits:
- [00:01:09] Gordo claiming goldfish posted about being terrified on Instagram with “fins down emojis”
- [00:02:42] Discussion of whether animals know when they win, referencing old Ticket debate about horses knowing they won races because “they’re in the winner’s circle”
- [00:06:51] Gordo making a Van Halen joke about bar owners named Alex and Eddie, then noting “Well, he’s dead”
- [00:08:12] Craig’s girlfriend’s ominous comment about his dying goldfish Javier: “he looks like our love starting to fade” – and they did break up soon after
- [00:12:17] Gordo’s disturbed reaction to Craig discussing old relationships: “I hate hearing about your old relationships. They just make me feel icky”
How the show wrapped up:
- [00:12:16] Gordo wins Emergency Break of the Week with his 104th victory, putting him 35 wins behind all-time leader Norm Hitzges
- [00:13:30] Tyler provides the standings update
- [00:13:52] Congratulations to Gordo as the segment and show concludes
Notable quotes:
- [00:05:57] PETA spokesperson: “There’s no excuse to do something like this in the 21st century…these fish aren’t racing. They’re panicking, gasping for air, slamming against the walls in a desperate attempt to escape”
- [00:08:46] Gordo on Craig’s goldfish disposal: “I guarantee you within 10 seconds, a catfish had taken him chum and eaten him”
Summary:
This final portion of The Musers wrapped up with Gordo’s “Observation Deck” segment focusing on the unlikely topic of goldfish racing in San Diego. The discussion evolved into a classic Ticket tangent about whether animals understand competition and winning, referencing the station’s legendary debate over whether horses know they’ve won races. Gordo delivered his signature absurdist humor by claiming the goldfish were posting their terror on social media with “fins down emojis.”
The conversation took a personal turn when Craig shared memories of his beloved goldfish Javier, who lived for three years in a simple fishbowl. The story included a darkly prophetic moment when Craig’s then-girlfriend compared the dying fish to their fading relationship – a comparison that proved accurate when they broke up shortly after. Craig’s attempt to honor Javier by releasing him into a pond was met with Gordo’s brutal reality check about the fish being immediately eaten by a catfish.
The show concluded with the Emergency Break of the Week voting, where several callers weighed in before Gordo secured his 104th victory. Producer Tyler provided updated standings showing Gordo still trailing all-time leader Norm Hitzges by 35 wins. The segment ended with Gordo expressing his distaste for hearing about Craig’s past relationships, maintaining the show’s tradition of personal ribbing and genuine chemistry between the hosts.
Analysis generated from archived transcripts. Hosts: Gordon Keith (Gordo), George Dunham, Craig Miller, Mike Rhyner, Donovan Lewis (Junior). Station: 1310 The Ticket, Dallas, TX.
