The Musers — 2025-10-12

The Musers — 1310 The Ticket, Dallas | Sunday, October 12, 2025

📋 Segments This Day

• E-Brake The Musers 10102025
• Observation Deck The Musers 10102025
• Fake Mack Brown The Musers 1092025
• State Fair Talk The Musers 1092025
• Observation Deck The Musers 1092025
• Marge Schwimdiddler The Musers 1082025
• Observation Deck The Musers 1082025
• Observation Deck The Musers 1072025
• Fake Nick Saban The Musers 1072025
• Fake Jerry The Musers 1062025
• Observation Deck The Musers 1062025
• E-Brake The Musers 1032025
• Observation Deck The Musers 1032025

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🎙️ Early Show Analysis

Segments in This Portion

• E-Brake (The Musers, 10/10/2025): The weekly Emergency Brake of the Week segment, broadcast live from Lula Mae Bistro in Terrell, Texas during a “Ticket Takeover” of that town. Three candidates were presented for the worst on-air gaffe of the week, and listeners voted via phone calls.

• Observation Deck (The Musers, 10/10/2025): Gordo’s regular commentary segment, sponsored by Tilock George Eye Care. Topics included AI-generated videos of historical figures and a viral (fake) story about a New York cannabis dispensary using carrier pigeons for deliveries.

• Fake Mack Brown (The Musers, 10/9/2025): A recurring comedy bit in which Gordo (or another host) voices a fake version of former Texas Longhorns head coach Mack Brown, done as a mock phone interview in advance of the Texas-OU game.

• State Fair Talk (The Musers, 10/9/2025): Craig Miller recounted taking his four-year-old daughter to the State Fair of Texas for the first time she was fully old enough to appreciate it, sparking a broader conversation about the fair experience.

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E-Brake Segment

The E-Brake was broadcast live from Lula Mae Bistro in Terrell during a Ticket Takeover event. Three candidates were presented:

• Candidate 1 — Corby Davidson: Made a bizarre, unidentifiable vocal noise mid-read during a live American Airlines advertisement, prompting his co-host to say “Oh my God” on air. The isolated sound was replayed multiple times.
• Candidate 2 — Gordo: During a “Rant Revival” segment, became confused trying to explain the “half your age plus seven” dating formula, accidentally inverting the math and stating “double your age minus seven,” leading to a chaotic, embarrassing on-air math meltdown.
• Candidate 3 — Craig Miller (“Johnny Ebrake”): Botched the show open, mispronouncing “mistake” as “a stake” (“maybe I made a stake”), stumbled over who was running the board, and generally fumbled the opening of the broadcast.

Winner: Corby Davidson, earning his 90th all-time E-Brake win, leaving him 49 behind the all-time leader “Norman Hitskiss.”

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Sports Topics Discussed

• Texas Longhorns / OU-Texas game: The Fake Mack Brown segment was framed around the upcoming Texas-OU Red River Rivalry game at the Cotton Bowl on Saturday. Arch Manning’s performance was discussed, with “Mack Brown” saying Arch “can’t throw the ball very well” and noting he sometimes looks like “Uncle Rico.”
• State Fair of Texas / Red River game weather: Craig noted the OU-Texas game on Saturday would again be around 90 degrees, lamenting that the last cool Red River game he could recall was in 2000.
• Kawhi Leonard (brief): During the E-Brake intro, a host accidentally called Kawhi Leonard “Kylie Leonard,” drawing immediate mockery — [“Is that a Kardashian?”] — before correcting himself.
• U.S. Men’s National Soccer Team: A phone caller mentioned the USMNT defeated Italy 3-0 and asked about Pochettino potentially calling up players. The host noted they’d discuss it at 8:30 with Barry Norman.

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Debates or Strong Opinions

• AI-generated video content (Observation Deck): George expressed measured skepticism about AI-generated videos of historical figures (Stephen Hawking, Martin Luther King Jr., Jesus), arguing that while Photoshop was disruptive, AI video is far more destabilizing because it’s indistinguishable from reality. Gordo pushed back, saying you might as well enjoy it in the meantime. A third voice [~00:02:27 Observation Deck] agreed with George’s framing — that the inability to tell what’s real makes it less funny, not more.

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Funny Moments, Gordo Bits, and Memorable Quotes

• Fake Mack Brown bit was the comedic centerpiece, featuring Gordo’s “Smack Brown” character riffing on:
• Mack Brown’s famous post-loss apologies, extended to apologizing for 9/11 and the JFK assassination
• Brown’s involvement in the “hot tour meme coin” and crypto (“except for things built on the Solana Layer 1 blockchain — the tokenomics work”)
• His staccato speech patterns: *”It’s going to sound like morse code being sent out from an unknown source, begging for rescue from a deserted island where castaways live on a diet of coconut and SEC victories”*
• His habit of mentioning wife Sally, escalating to explicit and absurd sexual references involving a “pegging kit” and a horse costume [~00:05:04–00:05:44 Fake Mack Brown]
• His self-contradicting speech pattern: *”People think nuclear power plants are dangerous, but they’re not. Tony Romo is good, but he’s not.”*

• Gordo’s AI videos (Observation Deck): Gordo described watching AI videos of Jesus and Martin Luther King Jr. trick-or-treating, Stephen Hawking on a half pipe, Stephen Hawking battling a bear, and Stephen Hawking in WWE — all “in his chair.” He also floated wanting to see *”the Pope go up top over Jordan and Pippin and slam one.”*

• Corby’s noise replayed: The isolated “yeah” sound from Corby’s American Airlines read was played multiple times and noted as a new drop for the show.

• Gordo’s math meltdown (E-Brake clip): The show replayed Gordo’s “double your age minus seven” confusion, leading to the line: *”So Darius Rucker can date a 125-year-old. He can hook up with the oldest nun in the world.”* [~00:05:20 E-Brake]

• “Maybe I made a stake” — Craig’s malapropism from the E-Brake clip, mocking his botched show open.

• P1 sends Gordo photo: A listener named Jeremy sent in an old photo of Gordo slumped severely in his studio chair, which the hosts called the “Stephen Hawking photo” on air, causing Gordo to protest repeatedly. [~00:09:07 Observation Deck]

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Phone Callers

• [~00:07:56 E-Brake] — Caller voting for “Gordon Elderly Love Keith and Hooter Brown” (E-Brake vote)
• [~00:08:15 E-Brake] — Caller asking about the USMNT’s 3-0 win over Italy and whether Pochettino should call up players; George redirected him to an 8:30 segment with Barry Norman, caller then voted for Craig
• [~00:08:54 E-Brake] — “Cruz and Lito,” asked about the Red River Pickleball Shootout result between Matt and Corby; voted for Corby. (George later got a text from Matt McLaren confirming Corby “smoked” him.)
• [~00:09:18 E-Brake] — “Jimmy Christopher calling for Barry Bunch,” tried to vote for “Rocco Pindola” (old Ticket names), eventually redirected to vote for Corby
• [~00:09:56 E-Brake] — “Ashley,” a 15-year-old P1 on a four-day school weekend, voted for Gordo as her “math tutor”
• [~00:10:41 E-Brake] — Caller voted for Gordo and offered him a compliment, saying he had “massively changed the way you do things in the past five years”
• [~00:10:58 E-Brake] — “Ralph, my sister’s brother,” offered a rambling non-sequitur about his “brother’s wife’s sister” stepping on a snake before voting for Corby
• [~00:12:11 E-Brake] — “Cooper’s cousin,” made an apparent crude remark, voted for “Gordo’s stinky panties”
• [~00:13:51 E-Brake] — Caller proposed a character idea for Gordo: “The Dumbass Dallas Sports Fan,” a satirical bit about a fan who complains about sports management for 30 years while continuing to support a morally compromised owner
• [~00:15:13 E-Brake] — “Fake Natalie Mains,” a recurring character/caller, voted for Craig (“Barry Switzer’s reparations”) as number three
• [~00:15:44 E-Brake] — Caller suggested doing a Corby “crack voice” sing-along, which George credited as the moment that clinched Corby’s win

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Recurring Bits, Characters, or Inside Jokes Referenced

• “Johnny Ebrake” / Craig as E-Brake perennial: Craig Miller is a long-running joke target for the E-Brake; he is referred to as “Craig Rosengarten” in this context, a recurring gag name
• “Fake Mack Brown” / “Smack Brown”: A recurring Gordo character doing an impression of the former Texas coach, with hallmark bits including the Sally shout-out and staccato speech analysis
• “Fake Natalie Mains”: A recurring caller character referenced at [~00:15:13 E-Brake]
• Norman Hitskiss: Referenced as the all-time E-Brake wins leader — an apparent ongoing inside joke/stat tracked on the show
• “Barry Bunch,” “Rocco Pindola,” “Barry Norman and Saks”: Old or recurring Ticket personality names dropped by callers and hosts
• Gordo’s “Stephen Hawking photo”: An old photo of Gordo slouched badly in his studio chair that has apparently become a recurring reference; a P1 sent it in live during the Observation Deck segment
• Red River Pickleball Shootout: Matt McLaren vs. Corby Davidson, apparently a recurring or one-off event tied to the Red River weekend; Corby won decisively
• Ticket Takeover of Terrell: The show broadcasting live from Lula Mae Bistro, with other shows (Invasion, Sweet Spot, Hard Line) down the street at Film Alley

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Three-Paragraph Summary

This portion of The Musers opens with the weekly Emergency Brake of the Week segment, broadcast live from Lula Mae Bistro in Terrell, Texas, during a full Ticket Takeover of the town. Three candidates competed: Corby Davidson’s bizarre mid-read vocal noise during a live American Airlines spot, Gordo’s spectacular failure to correctly explain the “half your age plus seven” dating formula on air, and Craig Miller’s chaotic fumbling of the show open — including the memorable malapropism “maybe I made a stake.” Listeners called in to vote, with a parade of P1s ranging from a 15-year-old superfan named Ashley to returning characters like Ralph and “Fake Natalie Mains.” Corby ultimately won his 90th all-time E-Brake, with the sing-along recreation of his strange noise serving as the final push.

The Observation Deck segment featured Gordo enthusiastically sharing AI-generated videos of Stephen Hawking, Martin Luther King Jr., and Jesus in absurd scenarios, while George pushed back with genuine concern about the destabilizing effects of realistic AI video. The debate was good-natured, with George acknowledging the novelty wore off for him quickly while Gordo argued you might as well laugh until the world falls apart. A P1 listener named Jeremy then sent in the legendary old photo of Gordo slumped in his studio chair — immediately dubbed the “Stephen Hawking photo” by the hosts — to Gordo’s vocal objection. The segment also covered a viral but fake story about a New York cannabis dispensary claiming to use trained carrier pigeons for deliveries, which led to an entertaining tangent about how carrier pigeons actually work and why most of them probably just fled battlefields in WWI.

The final two segments looked ahead to the Texas-OU Red River Rivalry game. The Fake Mack Brown bit was a full comedy interview with Gordo voicing “Smack Brown,” a foul-mouthed, self-aware version of the coach who apologized for 9/11, the JFK assassination, and a meme coin gone wrong, analyzed his own staccato speech patterns in real time, and repeatedly referenced wife Sally in increasingly explicit fashion before signing off. Craig then shared a warm and charming account of taking his four-year-old daughter to the State Fair of Texas for the first time she was truly old enough to enjoy it — Big Tex, the petting zoo camel stealing her feed cup, pony rides, Midway rides, and balloon-popping games — with the hosts reflecting on fair nostalgia and the rare feeling of communal joy the fairgrounds still manage to provide.

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⏰ Mid-Show Analysis

Analysis of This Portion of The Musers

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Segments That Appeared

• Pre-segment chat (unlabeled, ~00:07:12): Hosts discuss a daughter (apparently one host’s child) singing Taylor Swift’s “Bad Blood” (“Cannoli got bad blood”) and Queen’s “We Will Rock You.” The child’s adorable lyric flubs are played and celebrated. Discussion leads to George revealing he played violin for eight years (4th–12th grade) and the daughter just took her first violin lesson.

• Observation Deck – The Musers 10/9/2025: Gordo discusses an asteroid called 2024 YR4, which has been ruled out for an Earth collision but carries a 4.3% chance of hitting the Moon. He riffs on asteroid naming conventions, what a nuclear explosion in space actually does (no mushroom cloud, just an electromagnetic pulse and radiation belt), and whether someone from The Ticket would volunteer to heroically nuke it. EA is nominated as the sacrifice candidate.

• Observation Deck – The Musers 10/8/2025: Gordo (returned from a sick day) updates the story of a raccoon that got lodged in the grille of his car after he hit it. He eventually pulled it out with two right-handed gloves on. Animal control claimed they’d rehabilitate and release it; the hosts are deeply skeptical. The segment transitions into a story about Lubbock mounted police who tricked a drug suspect into running by claiming their horse was a narcotics-sniffing animal. This leads to a debate about horse vs. dog sense of smell, with Junior Googling stats that range wildly from 10,000 to 100 million times better than humans.

• Observation Deck – The Musers 10/7/2025: Gordo is out sick. George and Craig discuss the Musers podcast (upcoming episode on “cheating death”), then cover the Mark Sanchez felony charge story: Sanchez, drunk, accosted a 69-year-old truck driver at a hotel loading dock in Indianapolis at 2 a.m. the night before a Colts game. The driver defended himself with a knife. Sanchez now faces 1–8 years in prison. Comparison is made to Fox not firing Erin Andrews and Kristine Thompson over fabricated sideline reports.

• Marge Schwimdiddler – The Musers 10/8/2025: A recurring Gordo character, Marge Schwimdiddler (George’s fictional old swimming coach, in a wheelchair), stops by the studio. She reads listener mail, dispenses warped “life advice,” and makes inappropriate comments about George and Tim Kala. Dark, absurdist humor throughout.

• Fake Nick Saban – The Musers 10/7/2025: A Gordo impersonation of Nick Saban calls in. “Saban” critiques the crazy state of college football (Vanderbilt nearly covering against Alabama), complains about College GameDay, comments on Bill Belichick’s young girlfriend (“greatest recruiting job of all time”), and then pivots to listing everything wrong with The Ticket — signal issues, bad website, sophomore humor, questionable impersonations — before hanging up.

• Fake Jerry – The Musers 10/6/2025: A Gordo impersonation of Jerry Jones calls in to celebrate the Cowboys’ win over the Jets. “Jerry” speaks in his characteristic rambling, self-contradictory style, expressing positivity and coining the word “untrite.”

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Observation Deck Segments

• 10/9/2025 O-Deck: Gordo discussed asteroid 2024 YR4 — a “city killer” measuring up to 220 feet across, initially given a 3% chance of hitting Earth (now ruled out) but still holding a 4.3% chance of hitting the Moon. Discussion included: why asteroids don’t have names like hurricanes, how nuclear explosions behave differently in space (no fireball/shockwave/mushroom cloud; instead electromagnetic pulses and radiation belts via “Compton scattering”), whether anyone from The Ticket would volunteer to heroically detonate a nuke on it, and China’s plan to have astronauts on the Moon and build a nuclear power plant there by 2030.

• 10/8/2025 O-Deck: Gordo returned from illness and updated the raccoon-in-the-grille story. He also discussed a Lubbock mounted police story in which a drug suspect ran from officers because he believed their horse could sniff narcotics. This spawned a debate about whether horses or dogs have a better sense of smell, with Junior looking up stats showing dogs are 10,000–100 million times better than humans, while horses are about 60 times better — making dogs far superior sniffers and explaining why we don’t use horses as drug dogs.

• 10/7/2025 O-Deck: Gordo was out sick. George and Craig used the segment to cover the Mark Sanchez felony charge story (see above under Segments).

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Sports Topics Discussed

• Mark Sanchez incident (10/7): Detailed breakdown of Sanchez accosting a 69-year-old truck driver at 2 a.m. before an NFL broadcast assignment, getting stabbed, facing felony charges and 1–8 years in prison. Hosts took the view that this was entirely on Sanchez. George used it as a broader lesson about not escalating confrontations.
• George’s take: “It just takes one incident like this and you lose your job, you lose your life.”
• Noted that Fox had to call Brady Quinn to replace Sanchez for the Colts game with Chris Myers.
• Comparison drawn to Fox not firing Erin Andrews and Kristine Thompson over fabricated sideline reports, though hosts acknowledged “apples and oranges.”

• College football / Fake Nick Saban (10/7): Vanderbilt being competitive in the SEC, Alabama barely covering against Vandy. “Saban” noted the NIL transfer portal and media chaos drove him out of coaching. Bill Belichick struggling at North Carolina discussed; “Saban” praised Belichick’s young girlfriend as “the greatest recruiting job of all time.”

• Cowboys beat Jets (10/6) / Fake Jerry: Jerry Jones called in to celebrate the Cowboys’ victory over the Jets in the Meadowlands. Brief and comedic — no deep analysis.

• George and Bob’s Football Friends podcast mentioned as a weekly Thursday drop on the Musers podcast feed, described as going well.

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Notable Debates or Host Disagreements

• Raccoon rehabilitation (10/8): All hosts were skeptical that Dallas Animal Control actually rehabilitates injured wild raccoons. Gordo flatly said “There’s no way.” Junior (Craig) called it “a waste of public money.” George offered a more charitable interpretation. Gordo concluded the raccoon “met raccoon Jesus about a week ago.”

• Drug-sniffing horses vs. dogs (10/8): Light but sustained back-and-forth. Gordo pushed the idea that horses could be used as drug sniffers; George pointed out it’s impractical to bring a large horse into an airport. Junior’s Googling revealed dogs are vastly better sniffers despite horses having a decent sense of smell.

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Funny Moments, Gordo Bits, and Memorable One-Liners

• “Cannoli got bad blood” — A host’s four-year-old daughter’s Taylor Swift lyric mishap, singing “cannoli” instead of “cause I.” George’s response: “So it’s Italian food. She’s got a dessert base.”

• Marge Schwimdiddler (10/8): The bit escalates from gentle pranks (14 ping-pong balls in a Civic) to the second “prank” being: “That was the one where George took a sawzall to my spinal cord when I wouldn’t give him hand relief when he was coked up one night.” — one of the darkest/most absurdist Marge moments in the segment.
• Marge reads a restraining order from “George” (insisting it’s a different George) and concludes: “You know what I take from this letter? He really cares.”
• Marge’s life advice to listener Lisa includes: “Don’t go number two in a coffee can if you think it might be more liquid than anything.”
• Marge’s exit: asking what car Tim Kala drives so she can intercept him in the parking garage.

• Fake Nick Saban roasting The Ticket (10/7): “The string is always going down… you don’t seem to have a website that keeps up the 1998 standards… you celebrate failure… sophomore humor… very, very questionable impersonations… malfunctioning equipment in the control room… misplaced drops… live spot reads I don’t even know where you’re going with it. When you get your radio station straightened out, call me back.”

• Asteroid volunteer question (10/9): When asked if he’d volunteer to nuke the asteroid, one host said: “It depends on what I had going on in my life at the time… If I was happy with my life, I’d want someone else to do it. If I was unhappy with my life, I’d volunteer.” Gordo responded: “So you’re saying if you have a lot of errands to run you would not do it?”

• EA as the asteroid hero (10/9): The hosts imagine sending Ticket colleague EA to detonate the nuke on the asteroid — cutting to the spacecraft to find he’s fallen asleep, or “hitting golf balls on top of the asteroid.”

• Fake Jerry coining “untrite” (10/6): Jerry Jones tells the hosts he’s “being untrite” as he pivots from trite positivity. Classic Jerry gibberish.

• Mark Sanchez prior (10/7): When asked if Sanchez had any priors, George replied: “Not getting the Jets past the AFC championship game. I guess that’s a prior.”

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Pop Culture, Music, and Non-Sports Topics

• Taylor Swift’s “Bad Blood” and Queen’s “We Will Rock You” — played in adorable child-singing versions at the top.
• Asteroid 2024 YR4 and space science — nuclear explosions in space, Van Allen belts, Compton scattering, China’s moon plans.
• “Don’t Look Up” (Leonardo DiCaprio film) and “Armageddon” (Bruce Willis) referenced in asteroid conversation.
• The Musers podcast plug — upcoming episode on “cheating death,” current episode on “are these the craziest times ever?”
• George’s daughter taking her first violin lesson; George played violin from 4th through 12th grade; light discussion of whether violin improves math skills.
• General discussion of de-escalation vs. confrontation in everyday life, prompted by the Sanchez story.

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Summary

This portion of The Musers spans content from October 6–9, 2025, covering several days of programming. The material opens warmly with a host sharing audio of his four-year-old daughter mangling Taylor Swift and Queen lyrics — a charming, low-stakes moment that the crew clearly enjoys. From there the show cycles through a range of Gordo-driven bits and observational content: a detailed riff on asteroid 2024 YR4 and the physics (or lack thereof) of nuking it in space, a darkly funny Marge Schwimdiddler appearance involving listener mail and escalating absurdity, and a returning-from-illness Gordo discussing a raccoon he hit and extracted from his car grille with two right-handed gloves — only for animal control’s claimed “rehabilitation and release” plan to be met with unanimous skepticism.

The sports content is anchored by the Mark Sanchez felony charge story, which George and Craig handle seriously in Gordo’s absence on October 7th. The hosts lay out the full picture — Sanchez drunk at 2 a.m. before an NFL broadcast, accosting a 69-year-old truck driver over a parking dispute, getting stabbed, and now facing up to eight years in prison. The tone is genuinely concerned and reflective, with George drawing broader lessons about confrontation and de-escalation. It’s one of the more substantive news-driven segments in this batch. College football is handled more playfully via a Fake Nick Saban call-in, in which Gordo’s Saban impersonation complains about College GameDay, praises Belichick’s young girlfriend as a recruiting triumph, and closes by delivering a blistering (and self-aware) critique of The Ticket’s technical and creative shortcomings.

Throughout the portion, the show’s characteristic blend of absurdist humor, casual sports analysis, and personal storytelling is on full display. Gordo’s bits — Marge, Fake Saban, Fake Jerry, the asteroid monologue — dominate the comedic register, while George and Craig provide grounding and genuine sports conversation. The Musers podcast is promoted organically multiple times, with the “cheating death” episode discussed as something that genuinely resonated with all three hosts after recording it.

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🏁 Final Hour Analysis

Segments in This Portion

• Fake Jerry (The Musers 10/6/2025) [~00:00:47]: Gordo performs as a fake Jerry Jones, being interviewed by George and Craig about the Cowboys’ win over the Jets. Topics include Jets fans being hostile, the backup offensive line performing well, the Cowboys defense getting five sacks, rookie RB Jaden Blue’s Louis Vuitton cleat blister incident, and a running joke about Jerry’s acting ability and mortality.

• Observation Deck – The Musers 10/6/2025 [~00:00:00 of that segment]: Gordo’s observational commentary segment. George admits Gordo was right about Fox analyst Greg Olson dropping the “T” from words like “shot,” “not,” and “mountain.” They play clips to demonstrate. Gordo also raises observations about sideline reporter Pam Oliver’s on-air presentation, Cowboys kicker Brandon Aubrey missing an extra point and kicking out of bounds, and the unchanged nature of whistle technology in football.

• E-Brake – The Musers 10/3/2025 [~00:00:01 of that segment]: The weekly Emergency Brake of the Week segment. Three candidates for on-air gaffes: Bob Sturm mangling “six-disc changer,” CBS Sports’ Brian Jones substituting “shingles” for “shekels,” and Ticket staffer J. King accidentally saying “Indians” instead of “Guardians” live on air, then calling attention to his own mistake. Callers vote, and Bob Sturm wins his 48th E-Brake.

• Observation Deck – The Musers 10/3/2025 [~00:00:00 of that segment]: Gordo recounts the full story of hitting a raccoon with his car the previous morning at 50–60 mph, discovering it alive and wedged in his front grille, working with “Catman” (a Ticket staffer) to free it, and eventually calling animal control. Gordo gets emotional discussing the young raccoon’s fate. The segment devolves into a group accounting of animals each host has accidentally killed.

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Sports Topics Discussed

• Cowboys’ win over the Jets, including performance of the backup offensive line
• Cowboys linebacker Marius Leofau getting playing time and making an impact [Fake Jerry segment]
• Cowboys defensive coordinator Mike Eberflus and the defense recording five sacks
• Rookie RB Jaden Blue getting blisters from Louis Vuitton cleats and missing the game
• Cowboys’ all-white uniforms, attributed humorously to Charlotte Jones’ fashion input
• Cowboys kicker Brandon Aubrey missing an extra point and kicking out of bounds [Observation Deck 10/6]
• Greg Olson’s Fox broadcasting style and speech pattern analysis [Observation Deck 10/6]
• Pam Oliver’s sideline reporting compared to Erin Andrews’ treatment by Fox [Observation Deck 10/6]
• Cowboys at .500 (2–2 or 3–3 implied) after five games [Observation Deck 10/6]
• Dak Prescott using directional audibles (the “L word” for left) [Observation Deck 10/6]
• Dodgers leading Reds 5–0 and Tigers beating the Guardians [E-Brake, J. King clip]
• Jack Sanborn entering concussion protocol during the Cowboys-Jets game [Observation Deck 10/6, Pam Oliver clip]

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Strong Predictions or Bold Takes

• Gordo raises the possibility that Brandon Aubrey may be developing the yips, drawing a parallel to kicker Mike Vanderjagt’s decline, which he says he flagged early and was shouted down for [Observation Deck 10/6, ~00:09:21–00:10:46]
• Gordo suggests the injured raccoon was almost certainly euthanized by animal control, not rehabilitated [Observation Deck 10/3, ~00:09:49]

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Phone Callers

• First caller [E-Brake, ~00:06:36]: Votes for Bob, says “Bob’s front toilet” — presumably a garbled or joke vote.
• Second caller [~00:06:47]: Votes for “Bob, Richard Sturm, and Hooter Brown.”
• Third caller — “Coco” [~00:06:57]: Gordo performs as Coco the gorilla calling from “lower heaven,” noting Jane Goodall recently passed and joined her in the afterlife, ultimately voting for Bob.
• Fourth caller — Cruz and Lito [~00:08:07]: Makes an odd remark about cowboys’ kids tasting like “whiskey and chicken fried steak,” then votes for Bob.
• Fifth caller — “Brady Tom” [~00:08:30]: A recurring caller. Gives a shoutout to “the girls’ trip from Grayson County,” then votes for “Bob and his six dicks” — the malaprop version of the E-Brake clip, causing an immediate winner declaration.

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Funny Moments or Memorable Gordo Bits

• Fake Jerry’s Jets description [~00:01:08]: “They’re like a bunch of twitchy drifters that have nothing left to lose.” Fake Jerry says he even flipped some of them off because they accused him of caring about a gate agent’s baby.
• Fake Jerry on Leofau’s name [~00:02:47]: “You know how I pronounce it? Thirty-five.” (referring to the player’s jersey number).
• Fake Jerry on acting [~00:07:26]: Asked if he cares more about winning football than making money, he responds “Yes. I care more about winning football” in a dramatically sincere tone before revealing he studied under “Strasburg” (Strasberg).
• Fake Jerry’s mortality joke [~00:07:51]: “I’m about three years from the Grim Reaper and Satan showing up at the front door claiming my morally bankrupt soul. So I’ll take a win.”
• “Coco” calling from lower heaven [E-Brake, ~00:06:57]: Gordo performs as the late famous gorilla Coco, noting Jane Goodall’s recent death and welcoming her to “primate lower heaven,” taking a full minute to finally vote for Bob.
• Gordo’s raccoon rescue narrative [Observation Deck 10/3]: Full story of pulling a live raccoon from his car grille with one gloved hand — “very handyman Michael Jackson, a large utility glove on one hand only, because I had two right-handed gloves.”
• Gordo’s ritual for dispatching injured animals [~00:08:37]: “I go machete, I take off the shirt and oil myself… it’s a whole ritual for me.” George jokes about his choice of weapons including a brick, shovel, and Honda Accord.
• “Coyote Team Six” [~00:11:54]: Gordo jokes that for the “Half Cat” story, he quietly radioed in “cat Bin Laden” coordinates to a coyote squad.
• George running over his own dog Daisy [~00:13:22]: Old running bit resurrected — George accidentally ran over his wife’s dog on Christmas Day. Gordo jokes the wife was guiding him via walkie-talkie.

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How the Show Wrapped Up

The final segment transcribed is the Observation Deck from 10/3/2025, which ends mid-conversation on the raccoon story and the hosts comparing their animal-related vehicular incidents. There is no formal signoff in the transcript. The Fake Jerry segment ends with George saying “We’ll see you, Jerry” and someone noting “Jerry’s happy” at approximately the 8:50 mark, suggesting a hard-stop time cue.

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Notable Quotes

• Fake Jerry on the Jets: *”That’s the NFL’s version of elevator music, basically.”* [~00:02:02]
• Fake Jerry on the Cowboys’ defense early in the season: *”Our defense has been about as hard to watch as one of Jerry Jr.’s spelling bees. And I’m talking single syllable words being misspelled horribly.”* [~00:04:18]
• Fake Jerry on acting: *”Ask me if I care more about winning football than making money… Yes. I care more about winning football. Oh man, that was good. I studied under Strasburg.”* [~00:07:26]
• Gordo on Brandon Aubrey [Observation Deck 10/6, ~00:07:42]: *”I know that he’s the greatest human that God has ever allowed to be bipedal on earth. But what was going on yesterday?”*
• Gordo on the raccoon [Observation Deck 10/3, ~00:10:24]: *”As a baby, it was a young raccoon, and that was probably its mother it was running with… it had its whole life ahead of him, and that mother’s probably wondering where that thing is.”* — described as tearing up while telling the story.

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3-Paragraph Summary

This final portion of the show opens with the “Fake Jerry” segment from October 6th, in which Gordo voices a characteristically delusional and self-aggrandizing Jerry Jones being interviewed about the Cowboys’ win over the Jets. The bit mines familiar Jerry Jones caricature material — obsession with money-saving, flippant name-dropping, and cheerful moral bankruptcy — while touching on real Cowboys storylines including the backup offensive line’s strong performance, linebacker Marius Leofau’s breakout, the defense recording five sacks under coordinator Eberflus, and rookie Jaden Blue’s luxury-cleat blister incident. The segment is rich with absurdist one-liners, culminating in Fake Jerry demonstrating his “acting” by pretending to care about winning over profit.

The two Observation Deck segments offer contrasting flavors of Gordo content. The October 6th deck is a crisp, media-criticism-style outing in which George formally validates Gordo’s long-standing observation about Fox analyst Greg Olson dropping his T’s — playing multiple clips as evidence — before pivoting to questions about Pam Oliver’s sideline presence and Brandon Aubrey’s uncharacteristic misses. The October 3rd Observation Deck is a longer, more emotionally textured piece in which Gordo tells the complete story of hitting a juvenile raccoon with his car and spending the morning trying to free and save it, ultimately calling animal control. The segment is both funny and genuinely affecting, with Gordo audibly tearing up over the young raccoon’s likely fate, before the hosts collectively catalog their own accidental animal-related incidents — including George’s infamous Christmas Day running-over of his wife’s dog.

The E-Brake segment from October 3rd serves as the comedic centerpiece of the portion, showcasing three candidates: Bob Sturm’s stumble over “six-disc changer,” Brian Jones accidentally offering Jerry Jones “shingles” instead of “shekels,” and J. King’s live-on-air self-correction after nearly saying “Indians” instead of “Guardians.” The caller voting segment is particularly lively, featuring Gordo’s “Coco the gorilla” character calling from lower heaven, a tribute to the recently deceased Jane Goodall, and the decisive vote from recurring caller “Brady Tom,” whose mispronunciation of Bob’s clip clinches the win. Bob Sturm takes home his 48th career E-Brake, leaving him 91 behind all-time leader Norman.

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Analysis generated from archived transcripts. Hosts: Gordon Keith (Gordo), George Dunham, Craig Miller, Mike Rhyner, Donovan Lewis (Junior). Station: 1310 The Ticket, Dallas, TX.