The Musers — 2025-09-24
The Musers — 1310 The Ticket, Dallas | Wednesday, September 24, 2025
📋 Segments This Day
- Observation Deck
- Observation Deck The Musers 9222025
- Gordo Goes Wireless The Musers 9192025
- People say the Darndest Things About Sports
- E-Brake The Musers 9192025
- Gordo Goes Wireless
- Observation Deck The Musers 9192025
- Gordo Goes Wireless
- People say the Darndest Things About Sports
- Observation Deck
🎙️ Early Show Analysis
What segments appeared in this portion?
- Observation Deck: [00:00:00-00:08:15] Gordo discusses the 35th annual Ig Nobel Prize, highlighting absurd scientific studies like painting zebra stripes on cows to prevent fly bites, smartphone usage while on the toilet increasing hemorrhoid risk, and studying what type of pizza lizards prefer.
- Observation Deck (The Musers 9222025): [00:00:00-00:09:52] Discussion of the 1985 Bears’ Super Bowl Shuffle, NFL broadcasting observations about Kevin Burkhardt and Tom Brady, analysis of the Cowboys’ recent game including CeeDee Lamb’s injury, and commentary on Chicago’s flea flicker touchdown.
- Gordo Goes Wireless (The Musers 9192025): [00:00:00-00:08:13] Gordo interviews casino patrons at Choctaw Casino with a wireless microphone, including conversations with Teresa (a casino employee from Tennessee), a Vietnamese Cowboys fan, and an elderly couple who rekindled their romance after 40 years.
- People Say the Darndest Things About Sports: [00:00:01-00:02:02] Junior Miller reads listener submissions of sports-related misunderstandings, including a wife thinking “in the grasp” was “in the grass” and another believing Dallas teams were being blackmailed.
Sports topics discussed
- Cowboys: Discussion of CeeDee Lamb’s injury when used as a running back [00:06:05-00:07:21], criticism of team performance and productivity impact on DFW after losses [00:08:29-00:09:15], stadium renovations costing a quarter billion dollars [00:09:08-00:09:20]
- NFL Broadcasting: Analysis of referee Clay Martin looking like Greg Olson [00:02:38-00:02:51], ranking of TV analysts with Troy Aikman at the top, then Greg Olson, then Tom Brady [00:03:41-00:04:10], criticism of Kevin Burkhardt staring at the camera too much [00:05:10-00:05:37]
- 1985 Bears: Extended discussion of the Super Bowl Shuffle video and Jim McMahon’s “punchable face” [00:00:05-00:02:30]
Debates or strong opinions expressed
- Strong criticism of Kevin Burkhardt’s broadcasting style, specifically his habit of staring at the camera [00:05:10-00:05:26]
- Disagreement about Chris Collinsworth’s quality as an analyst, with some hosts defending him while others are “out on him” [00:04:02-00:04:40]
- Criticism of NFL injury protocols, questioning why players with potential serious injuries are allowed to walk around and test the injury [00:06:30-00:07:17]
Funny moments, Gordo bits, or memorable quotes
- Gordo’s toilet chess admission: “I’m a toilet chess player… there’s a good chance. It’s like, wow, man, all of a sudden Craig’s really attentive to this game” [00:02:58-00:03:15]
- “Instead you’re grunting one out over a Kohler” [00:03:25-00:03:28]
- Gordo’s awkward casino interviews, especially asking the elderly couple about their lovemaking [00:05:45-00:07:59]
- The pun: “all bats can fly, but not all flies can bat” [00:06:23-00:06:28]
- Junior’s confusion about “hang gliding” vs “hand gliding” [00:06:49-00:07:07]
Phone callers
- P1 Don submitted a story about his wife thinking “in the grasp” was “in the grass” [00:00:36-00:01:05]
- P1 Mark shared his wife’s conspiracy theory about Dallas teams being blackmailed [00:01:07-00:02:02]
Recurring bits, characters, or inside jokes
- Observation Deck: Gordo’s regular segment sponsored by “Tilock George I. Carey”
- People Say the Darndest Things About Sports: Junior’s recurring segment collecting listener submissions of sports misunderstandings
- Gordo Goes Wireless: Remote broadcasting bit where Gordo interviews random people with a wireless microphone
Summary
This portion of The Musers showcases the show’s signature blend of absurdist humor and sports commentary. The first segment features Gordo’s trademark quirky observations about the Ig Nobel Prize, leading to amusing tangents about toilet habits and bat flight patterns. The discussion reveals the hosts’ personalities – Gordo’s creative tangents, Junior’s analytical nature, and their collective sports knowledge mixed with bathroom humor.
The sports commentary focuses heavily on broadcasting criticism and Cowboys disappointment. The hosts demonstrate their deep knowledge of NFL personalities while expressing frustration with both team performance and media coverage. Their ranking of TV analysts and detailed observations about referee appearances show their insider perspective on sports media, while the Cowboys discussion reflects the ongoing disappointment of Dallas sports fans.
The wireless segment exemplifies Gordo’s interviewing style – simultaneously awkward and endearing as he asks increasingly personal questions of casino patrons. His conversation with the elderly couple who rekindled their romance becomes unexpectedly touching despite the inappropriate questions. Junior’s “People Say the Darndest Things” segment provides lighter fare, celebrating the innocent misunderstandings that make sports conversation universally relatable. Together, these segments demonstrate The Musers’ ability to seamlessly blend highbrow observations with lowbrow humor while maintaining genuine affection for both sports and their audience.
⏰ Mid-Show Analysis
Segments in this portion:
People say the Darndest Things About Sports [00:02:06-00:08:29]
- Collection of listener submissions about sports misunderstandings from wives and family members
- Stories included confusion about Cowboys documentary (thinking it was about Western cowboys), fantasy football rules, and various sports terminology mix-ups
E-Brake The Musers 9192025 [00:00:01-00:15:08]
- Weekly emergency brake voting segment featuring on-air mistakes
- Three candidates: Bob introducing wrong host, Will Connerly’s silent ticker moment, and Craig Rosengarten’s confused show transition
- Will Connerly won his first-ever E-brake for going silent during a ticker
Gordo Goes Wireless [00:00:00-00:07:57]
- Gordo interviews P1s at the Deep Eddie Vodka Donovan Miller Open Golf Tournament
- Featured conversations with Scott Brock (Highland Park graduate) and Will (electrician whose house burned down)
Observation Deck [00:00:00-00:01:39]
- Gordo’s segment about Colossal Biosciences bringing back extinct species like dire wolves and woolly mammoths
Sports topics discussed:
- Cowboys documentary on Netflix and team injuries [00:02:06, 00:02:51]
- Fantasy football draft strategies [00:03:31]
- Texas Rangers baseball games and playoff coverage [00:04:19]
- College football games including Alabama vs Florida State [00:06:07]
- Dallas Stars Western Conference Finals [00:07:45]
Phone callers:
E-brake voting callers [00:09:53-00:14:25]
- Multiple callers voting for E-brake candidates with various comedic interruptions
- Notable callers included “Bloody Murder Girl” and several fake character voices
- “Doggy for boys” caller discussing procreation positions
Funny moments and memorable one-liners:
- Wife thinking Cowboys documentary was about actual cowboys: “I was really surprised about this black cowboy with a mink coat getting busted with strippers and cocaine” [00:03:13]
- Fantasy football confusion: “It’s fantasy, you can draft whoever you want right?” about Troy Aikman [00:03:36]
- “Jimmy John surgery” instead of Tommy John surgery [00:07:17]
- Will Connerly’s dead air moment followed by “I just lost the copy” [00:04:45]
- Gordo’s tortoise replacement story during wireless segment [00:05:03]
Pop culture and non-sports topics:
- Netflix Cowboys documentary discussion [00:02:06]
- Emmy Awards recap mention [00:12:36]
- Catholics vs Convicts 30 for 30 confusion [00:05:07]
- Colossal Biosciences bringing back extinct species [Observation Deck segment]
This portion of The Musers showcased the show’s signature blend of sports talk and comedy, with the “People say the Darndest Things” segment highlighting humorous sports misunderstandings from listeners’ family members. The E-brake segment provided classic radio moments where on-air mistakes become entertainment, with Will Connerly earning his first victory for an awkward silent moment during a ticker read.
The wireless segment demonstrated Gordo’s unique interviewing style, starting with typical questions before diving into personal territory, including a touching story about a house fire and pet replacement. The show maintained its balance between genuine human interest and absurdist humor throughout, exemplifying The Ticket’s distinctive approach to sports radio that goes far beyond just game analysis and scores.
The various caller interactions during the E-brake voting showed the loyal P1 fanbase’s engagement with the show’s ongoing bits and characters, creating an interactive experience that extends beyond traditional radio broadcasting into a community-driven entertainment format.
🏁 Final Hour Analysis
Segments in this portion
Observation Deck – Gordo discussed extinct animal resurrection efforts by Colossal Biosciences, featuring woolly mammoths and dodo birds. The conversation evolved into discussion of the Ice Age animated movie and celebrity investors like Paris Hilton. Later transitioned to Joe Exotic’s music.
Gordo Goes Wireless – Gordo conducted field interviews at the Deep Eddie Vodka Donovan Miller Open Golf Tournament at Tango Ridge Golf Course. He spoke with golfers Scott Brock and Will, asking personal questions about their backgrounds, relationships, and life experiences.
People Say the Darndest Things About Sports – Junior Miller’s segment featuring listener-submitted stories of sports-related misunderstandings by family members, including confusion about football terminology, fantasy sports rules, and various sports concepts.
Observation Deck (second segment) – Gordo discussed the 35th annual Ig Nobel Prize ceremony, highlighting unusual research studies including smartphone usage on toilets and its connection to hemorrhoids, alcohol’s effects on bat flight, and pizza preferences of lizards.
Sports topics discussed
- Cowboys and Giants “flag fest” game referenced
- Fantasy football draft discussions
- Eagles vs Chiefs game analysis
- Texas Tech quarterback Baron Morton
- US Open tennis tournament
- College football (Alabama vs Florida State)
- Dallas Stars Western Conference Finals hockey
- Cowboys documentary on Netflix and Michael Irvin stories
Funny moments or memorable Gordo bits
- [04:21] Gordo’s absurd suggestion that Colossal Biosciences is “resurrecting Ice Age, the animated movie” and wanting to visit to “look at woolly mammoth sperm”
- [05:21] Discussion of Paris Hilton as an investor, with Gordo defending her intelligence and playing her song “Stars Are Blind”
- Golf tournament interviews: Gordo’s invasive questioning of golfer Scott Brock about his stepfamily relationships, calling it “dysfunctional”
- [05:03] The tortoise replacement story – Will’s house fire killed their pet tortoise, but friends secretly bought a replacement before the kids found out
- [07:42] Will joking that the tortoise death “probably was a suicide, actually, come to think of it. Kind of a boring life in that box”
Strong predictions or bold takes
- [05:12] Junior’s co-host predicting “Colossal Biosciences and Boston Dynamics will kill us all”
- Gordo’s stance that resurrecting prey animals like dodo birds is acceptable, but predators like dire wolves would be dangerous
Phone callers
No phone callers appeared in this portion.
How the show wrapped up
The show ended with Gordo completing his Observation Deck segment about the Ig Nobel Prizes, specifically discussing research about pizza preferences of lizards. The final exchange involved some playful banter about the practical implications of these unusual research studies, with Gordo sarcastically noting the importance of “that pizza lizard thing.”
Notable quotes
- [05:07] “I’m hoping they’re located here, where we can go look at woolly mammoth sperm” – Gordo on Colossal Biosciences
- [07:42] “It probably was a suicide, actually, come to think of it. Kind of a boring life in that box” – Will about his deceased tortoise
- [02:59] “Please stop, I’m bored” – How Ig Nobel Prize ceremony cuts off long speeches
- [04:55] “All bats can fly, but not all flies can bat” – Gordo’s wordplay
Summary
This final portion of The Musers showcased the show’s signature blend of absurdist humor and genuine curiosity about unusual topics. The segments moved seamlessly from scientific discussions about extinct animal resurrection to intimate field interviews at a charity golf tournament, demonstrating the show’s versatility in both content and tone.
Gordo’s field work at the golf tournament provided some of the most memorable moments, particularly his unexpectedly deep dive into golfer Will’s house fire story and the secret tortoise replacement. These conversations revealed the show’s ability to find compelling human stories in casual encounters, mixing humor with genuine pathos as Will described losing family mementos but being moved by friends’ support.
The show’s intellectual curiosity shone through in both Observation Deck segments, from the legitimate scientific discussion of de-extinction efforts to the playful examination of bizarre research studies honored by the Ig Nobel Prizes. Junior’s “People Say the Darndest Things About Sports” segment provided a perfect bridge between these more esoteric topics and the show’s sports-focused identity, demonstrating how sports terminology and concepts can create genuine comedy through innocent misunderstandings. The combination of highbrow scientific discussion, intimate personal storytelling, and accessible sports humor exemplified The Musers’ unique approach to morning radio entertainment.
Analysis generated from archived transcripts. Hosts: Gordon Keith (Gordo), George Dunham, Craig Miller, Mike Rhyner, Donovan Lewis (Junior). Station: 1310 The Ticket, Dallas, TX.
